Stressed
by pages.of.altaire
Summary: Being very angry at the results from the stress test, Shiro yells, sulks, and seeks some stress relief. Poor Ichigo, why is he the one always getting tortured and...touched?


**A/N:** I'm still alive people! So no worries or questions about whether I jumped off the cliff or hanged myself with my scarf. Anyways, it's been a long, long time hasn't it? Sorry, school's been keeping me busy...and my boyfriend is not giving me a break either. Phew! I now finally have some free time. *sigh* What's a girl to do? To the girls/guys out there who's busy running around getting to their classes and their boyfriends/girlfriends, I finally feel your pain. Yes, 'tis a sad world full of opressed and depressing people. But fuck that. Enjoy my story!

**Title:** Stressed

**Authoress:** Endou Miharu (Me!)

**Disclaimer:** I do NOT own Bleach. I sulk in my corner with pictures of Yanagi Kotaro, Kanata Hongo, and Kamakari Kenta.

**Word Count:** 1,064.

**Warning:** Mild language, sexual innuendos, etc.

* * *

It was a mild afternoon. While overlooking the road and the pedestrians down below, Ichigo fiddled with a plastic card in his hands. The piece of plastic was no bigger than a regular credit card, and on it bore the words **'Do you think that you're stressed out beyond belief? Take this stress test and find out'**. Although finding it a bit dumb, Ichigo was curious. So reading the instructions that were etched on the bottom, he pressed his thumb onto the little black square. After 15 seconds, Ichigo removed his thumb from the square and looked.

He was mildly surprised, the color on the square was green, the representation for the status 'calm'.

_'So I'm calm?'_ Ichigo thought to himself. _'But how can I be calm? I'm stressed out over hollows and nonexistent creatures for these past few months, and I have been shoved back and forth between Soul Society and my world due to stupid missions. And this card tells me that I'm calm?'_

After shuffling his thoughts in his head back and forth for 5 more minutes, Ichigo finally came to the perfect conclusion…

Humans create stupid and inaccurate things that often send people over the edge in a fit of panic, confusion, and seizure.

_'Speaking of which, I wonder if those stupid pregnancy tests really work?'_ Ichigo thought to himself randomly as he chucked the piece of trash into the wastebasket.

"Oi, king, it's not nice ta throw away useful stuff…" Shiro stated as he materialized out beside Ichigo.

"Shut up." Ichigo muttered and turned away from the albino. He wasn't in the mood for another fight today, physical or not.

Chuckling at his king's childish response, Shiro went over and fished the card out from the rest of the junk in the trash bin.

"So, mind if I use it?" Shiro asked while crawling back to the bed and dangling the card in front of Ichigo's face.

"It's not like I have a choice to say yes or no, you'll use it either way." Ichigo mumbled back, swatting the annoying limb away from his face.

"Hmmm, whatever." The albino shrugged and pressed his thumb over the square.

Ichigo stared back the hollow. _'He actually knows how to use that?' _He thought to himself.

"I don't really appreciate being called 'dumb' King. And yes, I do know how to use this crap." Shiro sneered as his flickered his obsidian eyes to meet Ichigo's rich brown ones.

"I didn't call you dumb." Ichigo retorted.

"Ya were implyin' it though." Shiro fired back with a shit-eating grin on his face.

"Hmmph. Whatever." Ichigo huffed back. Then turning his back to the albino, he curled up on himself.

15 seconds later…

"WHAT?!" Shiro shouted, startling Ichigo and many inanimate objects in the room, causing them all to fall from their shelves and bed.

"What the hell Shiro! Why are you-" Ichigo retorted back but was interrupted with the same stupid card in his face.

"This fuckin' piece of abomination jus' told me tha' I'm stressed! There's no way tha' I can be stressed, I don' even do anythin'! That's your job!" Shiro hissed as he scratched, bit, and snapped the card until it was beyond recognition. After that was done, he threw the pieces out the window.

"…Well…you sure sound like you're stressed." Ichigo lightly commented while scratching the back of his head. "And plus, why are you so worked up over a freakin' stupid stress test?"

Hearing this, Shiro lashed out his anger at the bright haired teen. Standing up on the clean bed, the albino loomed over the lithe boy with evil eyes. Emitting a dark aura, he snapped, "I am NOT STRESSED DAMMIT!!! And I don't get worked up over a fuckin' card!"

"Okay, okay, you're not stressed. Jeez." Ichigo quickly replied while backing away from the dangerous hollow. _'You're definitely stressed…or maybe just insane.' _He thought as he pressed himself flat against the headboard of his bed.

"I heard that." Shiro gritted his teeth and slowly turned his head to face the rash teen, giving him a death glare that promised suffering and pain.

'_Crap. How I HATE this stupid mental link we have between us!' _Ichigo screamed to himself as he paled at the sight of Shiro.

"S-Sorry." Ichigo stuttered out. Best apologize before it's too late, eh Ichigo?

"Whatever." The hollow muttered and retreated to the corner of room. Pulling his knees to his chest, Shiro sulked.

He _sulked_.

Looking at the sight that the albino created, Ichigo concluded that they might have similarities after all.

_2 minutes…_

_4 minutes…_

_6 minutes…_

"Hey King." Shiro called as he got up from his "emo corner", done with sulking for the moment.

"What?" Ichigo grunted back from his comfortable position on the bed, but immediately opened his eyes when he felt an extra weight on the mattress.

"So what do I do if I _am_ stressed?" Shiro asked while emphasizing the 'am'.

"What the hell! You just totally denied the fact that you're stressed 6 minutes ago! And now you're going back on your words?!" Ichigo asked in disbelief. Just how does a hollow's brain work, he will never know.

"Yes, fucker. Now, answer my damn question." The hollow growled out as he sat on the bed.

"Uh…go get some stress relief?" The naïve teen suggested while raising an eyebrow.

Shiro rolled his eyes at this, but then smirked, looking totally lecherous and perverted. He then had Ichigo pinned down firmly beneath him in a flash. Moving so that he now straddled the innocent orange-head, Shiro bent down to give a long lick to Ichigo's neck, enjoying the taste on the teen's skin. Ichigo gasped, and with strong arms, pushed Shiro away so that he could face the albino.

"W-What the hell do you think you're doing?!" Ichigo yelled in the hollow's face.

"What do you think I'm doing dumbass." Shiro snorted while trailing butterfly kisses down the shinigami's jaw. Grinding down on the body beneath him, Shiro smirked when he heard a muffled moan and a pant from the young shinigami.

"You're molesting me you bastard! Get the fuck off! NOW!!" Ichigo growled out while half-heartily pushing the sex god away. _Half-heartily_, because despite the fact that he is close to getting raped by the hollow, it felt very, _very_ good.

"No, I'm just getting some stress relief." The so-called "sex god" corrected, and before the hotheaded teen can speak another word, Shiro dived down to prey at the delicious lips.

Oh…this is definitely some excellent stress relief. There's no way that Ichigo is going to get himself out of this one. No way in hell.

* * *

**A/N:** That's done. So...what do you guys think? I dunno if these two are in character this time, but heck, I tried. This story just came out of no where, I don't know what the hell was I thinking when I wrote this. But oh well, at least I got something out, right? Please review and tell me what you think. Keyword, REVIEW!! As in typing a comment or a criticism for my story, not just reading it and faving it or...something...THANKS!!


End file.
